The Hair Debate: Sick & Tired Pt. 1

I am so sick and tired of the drama surrounding a black woman’s hair. This whole natural hair is better than relaxed hair and vice versa thing is really stupid. I mean in all actuality, why do people care? I could honestly careless about why a woman chooses to wear her hair natural or relaxed. So, why do some people take it upon themselves to care about what someone else does with their own hair?

For some natural hair enthusiasts, they believe relaxed hair is a form of self-hate because relaxed hair has somehow fallen under the standard of European beauty. For some relaxed hair enthusiasts, natural hair is a fad and it’s a tacky look. Well, I’m here to say that both of these ideas are ignorant ways of viewing a person’s choice to wear their hair the way they want to. I also have to say that for women who returned to their natural hair because they felt that is the only way to love themselves fully, kudos to you. However, a person doesn’t have to return to natural hair to love herself. Plenty of women with relaxed hair love themselves. Also, natural hair is not a fad and it is not tacky. When women outside of African american descent go between curly and straight hair, their hair is not deemed tacky or apart of a fad. So, black women choosing to embrace their natural hair shouldn’t be treated any differently.

My whole issue with this natural vs. relaxed hair debate is that it’s one of the stupidest debates to have. A hairstyle should not be viewed any differently than the pair of shoes someone decides to wear. A person’s hairstyle is a form of self-expression and is not meant to be devoured by people who don’t necessarily understand why it was done a particular way. Natural hair is NOT better than relaxed hair, and relaxed hair is NOT better than natural hair. You choose your hairstyle according to what you’re comfortable with and what makes you feel good about yourself. Relaxed hair does not mean you love yourself any more or less than a person who chooses to wear natural hair and vice versa. Period. I mean the beautiful thing about black women’s hair is that it’s so versatile and receptive to different techniques and styles. So, why has it become such a major issue to choose one technique or style over the other for some black women? People will always find a way to talk negatively about someone else; it doesn’t matter how silly the topic is either. There are so many other issues affecting black women that are more important to talk about like black women in leadership roles and interpersonal relationships black women have with men.

I have natural hair, and the way I wear my hair has no weight on how much I value myself. I choose different hairstyles because I like them and they complement my physical appearance. As India Irie said, “I am not my hair.” In my opinion, people who feel some kind of way about how others choose to wear their hair are not satisfied or comfortable with who they are. Now, I understand that some people who choose a particular hairstyle are living under false pretenses and want to have a particular look because they think they’ll be  accepted more by society. However, not everyone who wears their hair naturally or relaxed can be grouped in that category.

With that being said black women, we need think better and then do better! When women come together amazing things can happen.

Sisterhood is powerful. — Robin Morgan