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A letter to a friend

RiRi & Breezy Official

brown1Recently, Rihanna has come forth confirming her relationship with Chris Brown. No big surprise there. An official confirmation, in my opinion, wasn’t necessary. It was quite obvious that the two has rekindled their flame for some time now. Not to mention, there are constant uploads to RiRi’s Instagram account with pictures of her and Brown in intimate positions.

The pair’s actions have been screaming for attention, which is quite contradictory to what they say in the media. Rihanna and C.B. even paired up for her last album to create the song, Nobody’s Business. The thing is that with all the attention they’re trying to create for themselves, they’re doing just the opposite of what they supposedly want people to do. Yeah, it’s nobody’s business, but yet their actions show that they want the world to be in their business. If a celebrity really wants to have some kind of private romantic life, it’s hard, but possible.

I will say that I do like both artists’ music, but other than that I could careless about either one, more so Chris Brown. I don’t think he’s learned a lesson, and that he’s this new and improved person. Since the incident, he’s gotten into fights with other celebrities, thrown chairs, and never shy of a Twitter rant full of expletives. It appears that he has an anger issue. Yeah, yeah. I get the whole ‘he’s human’ thing, but other humans who have been in a domestic abuse situation have made noticeable changes in their lives. In my opinion, it doesn’t appear that he has.

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Now, what bothers me about Rihanna is that I don’t believe she ever wanted to leave him in the first place. I think she only did it because the media was coming down on her and her image. I am willing to bet that she hasn’t stopped communicating with him since the incident. Why take everyone through this roller coaster ride, knowing that you never wanted to leave his side in the beginning? I don’t think you can really get over a person, if that’s what you intend, by continuing to communicate and be around that person. So, in my opinion, I don’t think getting over him and moving on with her life is what she intended to do.

No one knows what happened back in 2009, but the end result was that Rihanna got beat up badly. We don’t know if she provoked him, which is possible, but what we do know is that the beating she got was violent. It wasn’t just one or two punches, or a push. Brown hit her repeatedly, and I haven’t seen any pictures of what damage she did to him. With that said, I don’t care to hear about the argument about how she provoked him because the end result is still the same.

I, like many other people are over what happened. Hell, I could really careless that they’re back together. I mean it was obvious that they were anyway. With the amount of people trying to pry into RiRi and Chris Brown’s private lives; how about they make an effort to stop contributing to people’s desire to do so by publicly displaying everything about their private lives. However, I’m sure that’s not a real solution because that’s not what they truly want to do. They enjoy the spotlight, and will bask in it as long as they can, and as long as people hold the light in their direction. My thing is don’t complain about something, and turn around and contribute to it. Actions DO speak LOUDER than words. And that’s all I have to say about that.

This is just my opinion. So, for all you Breezy fans out there don’t get…

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Lesson Learned

friendship dead endIn life we are often thrown curve balls. I in no way ever feel bitter or resentful because of this. I know with each curve ball thrown, there’s a lesson to be learned. With that said, I have definitely learned a valuable lesson when it comes to people we may at one time or another considered to be a friend.

Over the years, I, like many other people, have lost friendships. However, I never look at these situations as a loss because I truly believe that some people are not meant to be your friend forever. I will admit that I may have been the cause of some of these lost friendships. I am no way naive to that factor; however, I can also say that the person I presented myself as in the beginning is the person I will remain to be throughout all my relationships and friendships. That being said, I feel that the lessons I learn come from the friendships that I don’t necessarily receive a forewarning. Some people are very good at masking their identities, and portraying themselves as something they obviously aren’t. While most of these people are hard to detect, with time, their true colors will seep through.

I feel that God has blessed me with the ability to be a good judge in character. Thinking back, I am almost never shocked by the actions of other people whom of which I have or had a relationship/friendship with. The way that I’m most affected is through my feelings. Although people often show who they are through their actions rather than their words, I often give people the benefit of the doubt and turn the other cheek. I prefer to look for the good in people. Call it a flaw or what have you, but this is who I am.

I’m writing this post mainly because I’ve decided going into this new year to leave some people behind and wanted to share my perspective. A few people who I’ve considered to be friends, not necessarily best friends, have shown their true colors. Their lack of regard for our friendship were shown at times that left a lasting impression and a clear understanding of the type of friend they truly were. Whether it’s difficult or not, some times we have to make these kind of decisions. At the time, we may not understand, but it’s truly beneficial to let go of the negative in our lives so that we fully enjoy the positive things that life has to offer. Life is too short, and you never know when it’s your time to go. So, you should make the best of it, and allow it to be filled with things and people who bring you joy.

My words of advice are to distance yourself from people who don’t positively contribute to your life. As I mentioned before, it’s a hard decision to make, but in the end, you’ll see the positive difference it will make.

Love & Hip Hop ATL [Update Numero Tres ]

The last three episodes were of course filled with a ton of drama and craziness. I decided the easiest way to share my opinions would be  to do a breakdown by relationships.

Karlie & Benzino: I don’t understand their relationship at all. I’d like to know how much time lapses between episodes. Because their relationship is going quite quickly! A key to the house? Really?! And now he’s planning to propose? Whatever happen to a courtship? Dating? Waiting? Honestly, I don’t see their relationship lasting very long. However, I will agree with Benzino and how he feels about Karlie Redd always bringing up her career. I would get upset about that too, especially if it seems like that’s all we talk about it. I am interested in knowing where exactly her “career” is as well.

Stevie J., Joseline & Mimi: This love triangle is just stupid, and everyone involved is stupid. Joseline isn’t going to move on, which is known because of her conversation with Karlie Redd. Mimi is so stuck on being a family that she is willing to sacrifice what’s best for her. I understand that women in particular, would like to have their family in tact. However, if keeping the family together is unhealthy for those involved, it would be better to let it go and move on. A child can still grow up to be a productive adult even if his or her parents aren’t together. It happens everyday. I must say that I think it was very touching that Mimi shared her dedication to her mother with the world though. Stevie J is a hazard to himself and everyone he deals with. He has some serious issues, and needs to be left alone. I am glad that he got roughed up by Joseline, although it was for nothing because she’s going to return to him. I don’t buy into that whole “I don’t have a mother. So, I’m going to treat women bad” bid either. Stevie J is a womanizing liar and is just trying come up with a reason to excuse his behavior.

The Therapist: Who is this guy?! Was he recommended? Seriously, where did he come from? After watching Stevie J and Mimi in their session, I had to really wonder if that is how therapy goes. 

Karlie Redd & Joseline: This friendship came out of nowhere, at least to me. They had so much drama between them, and now they’re going rock climbing together. To each his or her own, I guess. I just think that of all the meetups between people beefing, it’s ironic that this was the only one that was successful. Well, maybe it’s because they’re the outcasts of the group. Who knows?

Erica, Scrappy & Shay: Scrappy has no idea what he wants in life. Erica is well in her right to be skeptical of their relationship or lack thereof. Scrappy needs to be by himself for a while, so that he can figure things out. However, I don’t think that is going to happen, especially since Erica said that he can’t be by himself. I like Erica a lot. I think she is genuine, but has her weaknesses. When she cried and asked Scrappy how he would feel if a guy treated their daughter the same way he treats her, that broke my heart. That question should have really struck a nerve with Scrappy; I’m not sure that it did. Shay is so naive. She seems to be completely oblivious to the relationship Scrappy has with Erica. I’m not sure if she chooses to be that way, or if she just can’t put two and two together.

Mama D: I am quite happy that Scrappy corrected her about referring to the mother of her grandchild as a bitch. I think she was totally out of line. I can definitely appreciate him for speaking up. She obviously has issues though. I mean she misspelled bitch and I’m not sure if they edited out her correcting herself, but it didn’t appear that she realized her error.

K. Michelle: I think she has some serious issues. However, I do believe that she was abused by Memphitz. I absolutely do not condone violence against anyone, but I think she was having a crazy K. Michelle episode and pushed all of his buttons. Although it can happen, I don’t think he just all of a sudden start beating her. I wish we could get the entire story, but that will never happen. At the end of the day, I sympathize with her because she is a survivor. Whether or not she said something or did something to provoke him, he should have had enough self-control to walk away from the situation.

Rasheeda & Kirk: I love these two. While the content of their trials and tribulations may not be common, the way they handle them as  married couple deserves kudos. No one is perfect, but they always seem to come to a common ground when it comes to their relationship. It surprised me that Rasheeda decided to keep Kirk as her manager. I thought that was very admirable of her. Her ability to switch between the many roles she plays is awesome and worth taking note of. Even though Rasheeda is one of my two favorite characters, I’m a little uneasy on the way she handled the meeting with K. Michelle. I believe she should have asked K. Michelle her side of the story and then explained to K. Michelle her relationship with Toya & Memphitz.

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